Section I
The Flow of Water
Watering with Awareness
Welcome, and thank you for choosing to build this stage of your life in a meaningful and enriching way, both for yourselves and for your children.
"Love Vows" is not a parenting manual or a guide on how to educate your children. It does not seek to provide instructions but rather an invitation to connect more deeply with them.
My name is Pablo, and although I am not a father, I wrote this book from the perspective of a child—because we have all been children first. The relationship between parents and children is one of the most important and, at times, one of the most challenging bonds in life. It forms the foundation of who we are, how we see the world, and how we learn to relate to others.
Imagine that you, as a parent, are a hose. Your child is like the many plants that exist around you—some are vibrant flowers, others are resilient herbs, each with its own unique characteristics. And you decide what to water.
Your actions are the water that either nourishes or harms. The strength with which the water flows represent your values and emotions. If the stream is too strong or lacks direction, it can cause harm instead of nurturing. And without realizing it, we may impact our children in ways that could shape them for life.
Perhaps at some point, we have poured water without realizing its effect—out of haste, anger, or impatience. Sometimes, we do it because we believe it is the best way. We want our children to be strong, to understand how life works, to learn to defend themselves. Other times, we react without thinking, driven by exhaustion, stress, or the wounds of our past.
But the important thing is that we always have the choice of where to direct the water.
The Impact of Every Drop
Every word a parent speaks leaves a mark on their child. It can be a seed that blossoms over time or a thorn that lingers for years.
There are phrases that nurture:
· "I trust you."
· "I am here for you."
· "I am proud of you."
And there are phrases that wound:
· "You're good for nothing."
· "You always do everything wrong."
· "You disappoint me."
No matter how many times we tell a child they are valuable, if at the same time we water them with words of criticism and rejection, the impact of those wounds may last longer than we imagine.
In the end, what they will remember most is not what we taught them, but how we made them feel.
That is why Love Vows serves as a reminder of where to direct that water. It is a signal pointing towards self-love, confidence, self-esteem, emotional intelligence, gratitude, and respect.
It’s Not About Being Perfect
Many parents feel the pressure to be perfect. But the truth is, there are no perfect parents. What truly exists are present parents—those who, amid their successes and mistakes, are willing to learn, grow, and love in the best way possible.
It’s not about avoiding mistakes; it’s about learning how to repair them. If at some point you poured water with too much force and unintentionally hurt your child, you can always return and water them again—this time with love, patience, and new words and actions.
The problem is not making mistakes; it’s not acknowledging them.
When a parent can say, "I'm sorry, I made a mistake," they teach their child a valuable lesson: that they don’t need to be perfect to be loved, that they can make mistakes and still be worthy and valuable.
A Book That Guides, not a Rulebook
"Love Vows" does not aim to tell you what to do or how to raise your child. There are no magic formulas for parenting because every child is unique.
Rather, this book is a compass—an invitation to reflect on how you want to be remembered by your child, what kind of connection you want to build with them, and what seeds you want to plant in their heart.
This is not a book meant to teach children.
It is a book meant to remind parents of the importance of love in childhood.
Because childhood is short, but its impact lasts a lifetime.
So before moving forward, I invite you to ask yourself:
"Every action and word we give to our children is like the water that nourishes them. The way we raise them shapes what will grow within them."
What do I want to water in my child today?
What values and emotions am I nurturing in my children through my words and daily actions?
What kind of energy do I transmit when I interact with them? Is it calm, love, impatience, anger?
If I had to consciously choose today what I want to flourish in my children, what would it be?